September the Eleventh (Terror's Tears)

September the Eleventh (Terror’s Tears)


It’s a normal day and I’m happier than ever.
I snort the line of coke, but can I keep things together?
Leave a name in history to show them that I exist.
But every person I open up to is a....GODDAMN TERRORIST!!!
(GODDAMN TERRORIST!) (GODDAMN TERRORIST!)

This is fucking 9/11. So crash your plane into my HEART!!! 
This windowed tower won’t reach heaven. It’s just where all their dreams will start...

I underestimated you! Strapped around those silky thighs were all of your alibis.
Who are you!? I dedicated half my life so you could slip a knife on this flight.

The deceptive red lipstick and strawberry blonde wig bypassed the hearts of security so you could stab the pig. I cried when America was burning down. I died when lady liberty hit the ground...

(Singing:)

This is fucking 9/11. So crash your plane into my HEART!!!
This windowed tower won’t reach heaven. It’s just where all their dreams will start...
This is fucking 9/11. Today we’re flying to the stars.
Two hundred and twenty-seven martyrs will leave three thousand fucking SCARS!!!

Watching her maniacally laugh as bodies jumped out of the glass. Regret built up inside my throat as she sucked the world of all their hope. She lost the ones she loved the most. So Terror haunts this realm just like a ghost. Inflicting her pain upon the mass, thinking the future is the past.

From orange evening skies the hijacked plane descends. Her heart too troubled for the city below to mend. She knows that her actions will haunt her forever. She crashes, and will always remember...the sorrowful day of the eleventh of September.

(I scream:)

This is fucking 9/11. So crash your plane into my HEART!!! 
This windowed tower won’t reach heaven. It’s just where all their dreams will start...

Every person I open up to is a... goddamn terrorist....( A goddamn terrorist) (A goddamn terrorist) (A goddamn terrorist)...

                                                                                   ~Brandon Ðefiance




(We do not own the rights to the images above.)

Life Update (5/15/13)

Number Anxiety
Well...I made it! I survived my first two years of college with making ALL A’s...and one B (that I don’t wanna talk about. haha) I overcame one of the biggest demons that oppressed me into believing that I was stupid, Mathematics. To pass high school I had to be in Special Ed. Math classes because they taught me at an understandable speed, since then I have passed complex math courses like Probability & Statistics and College Algebra/ Pre-Calculus. I’m feeling really good about my ability to overcome the things that bind me in this world. Although there are those things that still do bind me on a daily basis.

Breakup history
If you do not know me well I’ve only had one serious girlfriend and that lasted seven years until a little over two years ago; Rachel later married “the man of her dreams.” I wasn’t him, I didn’t control her and shatter her things; I’m not a monster. Those that remember us being together said we were inseparable. We were living one of them lost love stories that you see old people living out as they watch their significant other slowly pass away. Well, I thought it was perfect til one day I woke up and realized that the relationships we spend years building in this world can be burnt to the ground in a matter of seconds. Now I’m left here holding the ashes of the past, caring about the well-being of this person that no longer cares about me.

Nice guys don’t finish at all
Nice guys finish last, well that’s the understatement of the year, and from my point-of-view nice guys don’t finish at all. They settle if they want a relationship because the people they try so hard to be with don’t think they are good enough. I have rebuilt myself back up into the person I want to be. I feel like I have greater confidence and I have control of my future, but no one likes me back. Sound like a lifelong curse. Everyone that wants to date me is not my type and everyone I want to date wants me to stay in the friend zone. I really can do all of this alone I just wish I had someone to share this with, that’s all. To many of my friends I came out as bisexual, to help increase my chances of happiness, but that didn’t work.haha I’ve met some nice gay people like my good friend, Zach, but many gay people are just like everyone else. They play that game in their head were they think they are better than everyone else. I don’t like it. Most people are evil and I just play as a mute drone in their society.

The good news...
Life has laid out a path for me and I’m going to follow it. I opened up a heavy letter in the mail from MTSU and it was a six thousand dollar scholarship, yesterday I opened up another letter and it was a five hundred dollar scholarship to pay for books. Someone that has an influence on this universe is trying to tell me something. I have worked hard for things like this, but these things have never been rewarded to me before. The second thing I want to mention is that my novel, Cinder Fingers, which was finished in 2009 is finally going to get published this year of 2013- included with revisions and pictures that weren’t possible a few years back. I have a very good friend working on the project with me. Now that I have a physical copy of the novel it is easier for me (and her) to make revisions on it before it is sent off. It is going to be published through a company under Amazon called Createspace. This will be the first edition of the book and will be soft cover only and no color print. The book can be later picked up by a publishing house in the future. This book will be pretty cheap and I hope everyone interested picks up a copy.

Fun in the sun
I am not looking for a job this summer. Many things have to get done, although I may find a job in Murfreesboro once I get settled in with the area. First, with my Sony handycam I got for Christmas I am going to start a professional youtube channel that rates media like video games and albums, and also make creative and informal videos. Second, I am going to get tanned and toned (I know this sounds like Jersey shore.) If anyone wants to start working out or walking/jogging this summer hit me up. I need to lose about forty pounds. Third, I am going to keep writing while editing Cinder Fingers and I will be working on chapters of my new circus novel and be putting out new creative writings all the time online. If you didn’t get a chance to read my three writings that were published in The Mosaic (a literary magazine done through Motlow), here is a link (http://www.mscc.edu/themosaic/MosaicFall2012.pdf). Thank you to those who took the time and read all of this. It makes me happy.                                                                                                                                                                                                          

                                       ~Brandon Ðefiance

(We do not own the rights to the images above. Rights reserved to their original owners.)